


summer rain

by justfiveseconds



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: 3am writing, Death, Depressed Luke, Lashton - Freeform, M/M, Self Harm, Suicide, at the end, bye, i guess idk, i was going to put smut but eh, idk how to tag, liz is mentioned, this is actually kind of sad, this is really bad, yeah - Freeform, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-27
Updated: 2014-05-27
Packaged: 2018-01-26 05:33:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1676552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justfiveseconds/pseuds/justfiveseconds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>luke likes to watch the rain drip down the windows and ashton wants to know why</p><p>or the night when ashton finds luke in a corner and he finds a way to stop feeling like he's drowning</p>
            </blockquote>





	summer rain

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! So if any of you were reading my cake fic, i realize that my last update was like a month ago and i'm working on that (its because i wasn't planning on continuing it but now i am). Anyways, this is a little sad suicide fic that i whipped up at like 3am when i was actually very sad and i thought i would post it. (lowercase for a reason and excessive amount of spacing is laughable) (also i definitely could of thought of a better title but whatever). Its very badly written and i hope you enjoy.

sometimes, when the "infinite sadness" as he would say, when it got bad,

luke would leave.

maybe not physically, no.

but he would seem to fall off the face of the planet sometimes, fighting to make it back alive.

luke would gaze outside, watching the summer rain go pitter-patter on the window for hours on end.

ashton noticed he did that a lot, so one day, he asked the doctor.

she said it was only a side effect of depression and that she would alter his medication soon.

ashton thanked her, then went on his way.

he asked calum, and michael, his mum, and even harry.

"It's just the depression ashton.

don't worry."

he worried.

one day, ashton decided he was going to ask luke.

So he did.

"why do you like to watch the rain?", ashton whispered to luke one stormy night.

they laid there in the bed, both listening to the peaceful sound of angels tears hit the glass.

"because."

"because what?"

"because it reminds me of you."

ashton didn't say anything, and neither did luke.

he didn't ask why, so luke didn't answer.

the only thing you could hear, for those sweet moments,

was the rain going pitter-patter on the window.

"I see beauty in things that no one else does ashton."

"I know.

thats's why you love me."

luke's soft, broken laugh seemed to bounce off the walls in the late hour.

"did you know I love the dimples in your back?"

"the one's I hate?"

"yes."

"no."

Luke looked blankly at the window.

"oh.

i'm sorry."

ashton laughed.

"you don't have to say sorry love."

luke was quiet.

"but it's my job to let you know that they are beautiful.

like you."

ashton nuzzled his face into luke's neck, wrapping his arms around his fragile boy.

"I love you."

ashton said.

he felt luke tense under his palms.

"okay."

luke said.

 

that was the night before "the night".

the night when ashton found a crumpled note on the bathroom floor

with his fragile boy in the same state

dead

in the corner. 

"i like the summer rain  
i like the sounds you make  
you are my getaway  
you are my favorite place  
sorry for disconnecting 

I love you too ash."

ashton felt like he was drowning,

drowning in everything he could of said to stop this, 

to stop luke from disconnecting.

ashton kept drowning while the police came,

lights in his face and microphones amplifying his every word.

when liz came,

weeping into ashton's chest,

when he had to keep acting like he wasn't drowning:

acting like he was strong. 

ashton was still drowning the next day when everyone came to

comfort him 

but he could convince no one that nothing could

comfort him like

luke could.

ashton thought that dying would be less painful 

then feeling like you're drowning 

everyday

every night 

in your dreams

all the time.

ashton watched the rain drip down the windows

just like luke would those sad nights.

drip

drip

drip.

ashton watched as the blood dripped down his pale arm.

drip

drip

drip.

ashton watched till he wasn't drowning anymore.

drip

drip

ashton laid on the floor, a faint smile on his sad face.

he was going to be with luke soon,

and that

was good. 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading lovelies! click kudos and then leave a little comment for me to read because i have very low self esteem. 
> 
> i'm kidding lol  
> (kinda)  
> leave a comment i like to read them okay  
> okay.  
> bye


End file.
